Thursday, October 26, 2006

Thursday Musette

Fossil Fish...

My congratulations! I'd offer advice on having a happy, lasting marriage, but frankly I can't think of any. Mary and I have been married for twenty years and it's always been up and down, good luck and bad, and in all that time we've gone through some very bad patches. But she's my compass. I've never had any doubts as to whether I love her. I've kept in mind that our marriage and our love for each other is more important than anything else, including my pride. Sometimes, it's very necessary to say, "Yes, my love" even when I know she's wrong. A couple of decades from now, I truly hope you find yourself thinking that you can't imagine how you got along without her.

Oh, I do have some advice. When planning a wedding, brides-to-be and their mothers go completely berserk. Heated arguments and tears can erupt over some inconsequential details, like what color flowers to have on the third row of guest tables, or some such nonsense. Duck as much of it as you can, because while your presence is required, your input is not. They'll ignore you anyway. Nod sagely at times. Offer a shoulder to cry on. Take the long term view. A wedding is one day but a marriage is for life.

And I really like the idea of registering at a bike shop! If you don't object, I may steal it!

A pleasant rut...

I resigned as membership director of the Oklahoma Bicycling Coalition. I wasn't able to attend all the board meetings, and I fell that OBC needs people who can be more hands-on. So I've fallen into a rut, a pleasant cycle of family, work, and writing that I really enjoy. Some might find that boring and monotonous, but after having far too much tension this summer, I'll take this rut gladly.

A long Wally story... in the works. I like the character, and no, it's not semi-autobiographical. Wally is a schemer, but a good-hearted one. He'd con the shirt from your back just for a lark, but if you were cold, he'd offer his own.

Writing humorous fiction is a challenge. I enjoy coming up with some funny ideas, then trying to find a way to tie them together with narrative. If it's clunky at times, I apologize. I've had no formal training at writing - other than abysmally boring experiences in high school and college - and really didn't discover the fun in it until I began writing for an amateur radio publication some years ago. And yes, I wrote about Broken Elbow, Oklahoma back then too.

My influences have been Patrick McManus, Garrison Keillor, and the late Lewis Grizzard, among others. I haven't stolen their ideas, of course, but I like their point of view, particularly when it comes to small towns. I can relate to McManus' description of his boyhood bicycle as having been assembled by a local village fiend with his own three hands. Broken Elbow is a composite of some of the places I've lived, and those small towns are a kind of petri dish for observing human behavior.

I see stooopid people!

Coming home from work this afternoon, a fat-assed pickup with a rotund driver at the wheel, flew by with horn blaring. God smiled. I smiled because God turned the signal red at that instant. I was in the left turn lane next to Fat Guy, and said, "Hey! Your horn WORKS!"

"So do you!" he yelled back.

I started laughing, so he had to cover his faux pas with the traditional, "Fuck you, moron!" Then he zoomed off.

But I really gotta wonder if the little boy sitting in the passenger seat used the "Fuck you, moron!" when he got home. Mom would have been pissed. A big argument ensued with Fat Guy storming out of the house to a bar somewhere. Meanwhile, wifie snooped through his computer and found a bunch of porno, called her mother, called her lawyer, and then divorced his fat ass taking the truck, the house, and most all his assets.

I have a vindictive imagination.


Blogger Coelecanth said...

Twenty years! Good on ya, I aspire to such.

No worries about the advice. Although neither of us have been married before we're not exactly wet behind the ears. I'm forty and she's, well, a gentleman doesn't mention a lady's age. Mind you, the advice you did give is excellent. Thanks for that and your good wishes, it's folks like you that make these here internets worth visiting.

Honestly, I suspect that 20 years from now I'll realize this is the smartest thing I've ever done.

As to the bike registry, steal away. Good ideas are only made better by being spread around.

6:52 PM  

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